CODSWALLOPPED
Having made a passing reference to Mick Fleetwood in Tuesday’s thrilling edition of your favourite email, Football Daily genuinely wasn’t expecting to be repeatedly typing that particular F-word in our lead story in today’s edition. While we were aware Arsenal were in the coastal town of Fleetwood for a Fizzy Cup tie that could scarcely have been less glamorous than the previous evening’s Ballon d’Or ceremony at the Palladium, the needle on our patented Potential Shock-o-Meter had barely moved before a match pitting the Premier League champions against a side struggling in League Two. Even with the residual winds from Storm Boelo still buffeting the ground, we presumed Arsenal’s second string would have enough about them to record a comfortable win at Highbury, over 20 years after they left a London stadium of the same name to begin their residency at the Emirates. It was not to be and almost five months to the day since exiting a cup competition on penalties following a curiously flat and uninspired display, Mikel Arteta’s side exited a cup competition on penalties following etc, and so on.
Considering their team came into this game on the back of consecutive defeats by Cheltenham and Exeter, Fleetwood’s Cod Army would almost certainly have settled for seeing their players avoid embarrassment but after watching them go ahead against a team of Fancy Dans who were visibly labouring in the miserable conditions expectations were duly raised. Arsenal equalised courtesy of a scrambled Viktor Gyökeres effort that is unlikely to trouble the Puskas Award jury, before all hell broke loose when young Max Dowman was sent off for retaliation following a Harrison Neal challenge that – depending entirely on what team you support – was a potential career-ender or wasn’t even a foul. While he is not yet old enough to drive, get a tattoo or vote, Dowman has apparently been around long enough to earn himself a stinging rebuke from his manager, who conveyed the impression the 16-year-old could look forward to being sent to bed without any supper and having his screen-time vastly reduced.
A penalty shootout in which yet another Brazilian missed a crucial spot-kick for the Gunners ended in victory for Fleetwood, when Conor Haughey fired past Illan Meslier to make it five successful kicks out of five for the hosts. The second teenager to disgrace himself on the night, the young man from Norn Iron proceeded to drop a different kind of F-bomb in a post-match interview with Sky Sports. Asked what had been going through his mind before he took his penalty, Haughey replied: “Hit the top corner and run like f**k.”
Despite the post-watershed lateness of the hour, Sky’s pitchside reporter felt compelled to apologise to viewers for the youngster’s forthright response. While Arteta is left to focus on making sure his players get their act together ahead of Sunday’s trip to Liverpool, Fleetwood head coach, Matt Lawlor, can look forward to tonight’s quarter-final draw. “I’ve got no preference whatsoever,” he said. “We’ve got a big game at home [against Bristol Rovers] on Saturday and I want to win it. I would absolutely love to make an amazing night into an amazing week.” For Arsenal, on a night when heroes were hard to find, the dream of a domestic treble went its own way.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
The MBM OGs are in tandem tonight for steaming hot live action. Join Scott Murray from 8pm GMT for Carling Cup fourth-round updates from Liverpool 3-2 Chelsea while Rob Smyth will be on deck at the same time to talk us through Arsenal 1-1 Benfica in the Women’s Champions League.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“Our club holds deep respect for China, its history, its culture, and its citizens, as well as for the millions of Chinese fans who feel affection and admiration for Real Madrid. The club joins the public apology expressed by Kylian Mbappé, in which the player himself has conveyed his regret for his words and reiterated his respect for the Chinese people” – Real Madrid are in crisis PR mode as Mbappé’s Chairman Mao comments reach the second day of saying sorry.
Your headline Mbappé’s China Crisis leads me to point out he was born in Paris and is not one half of a synth pop duo from Kirkby, Merseyside – Kev The Poet, Tiverton (born in Kirkby).
So pathetic Arsenal get knocked out of the Carabao Cup by plucky Fleetwood Town. I think that Michael Carrick should be sacked immediately! – Nigel Sanders.
The Nevada in Florida story reminded me of my coaching time with under-11s in Maryland in the 90s. The rule from the league was clear, if you’re leading by six goals at half-time, take off the star(s) for the second half. Football was designed to develop as well as to win. As for parents, I had them stand in an area I designated where during game-time they could encourage their scions but not encroach. This was unusual but they understood this strange Brit in a faraway land and it worked well for everyone. Happy times and no police needed, except welcomed as parents! – Jeremy Foxon.
Regarding the quote of the day from Wayne Rooney in yesterday’s Football Daily, he seems to be inferring that players from Brentford and Wolves are not good enough for Manchester United. This is from a man who signed for said United in the summer of 2004 from Everton, who (checks online encyclopaedia) finished 17th in the Premier League a couple of months earlier. Pot/kettle? – Tracey in Leicester.
If you have any, please send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s prizeless letter o’ the day goes to … Kev The Poet. Terms and conditions for our competitions, when we run them, are here.
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