Ever since “The Bachelor” alum Ashley Iaconetti was announced as one of the seven women anchoring Bravo’s “The Real Housewives of Rhode Island,” fans of the long-running ABC franchise — which featured the reality star on at least four iterations — have been eager to see what she’s up to now.
Iaconetti is somewhat of an icon within Bachelor Nation. Thanks to her intense emotions, her appearances on the franchise’s multiple spinoffs have supplied viewers with gloriously entertaining confessionals and countless tear-filled outbursts. After making her “The Bachelor” debut in 2015 as one of the 30 women vying for Chris Soules’ heart in Season 19, she went on to appear on Seasons 2 and 3 of “Bachelor in Paradise,” followed by a stint on the inaugural “Bachelor Winter Games.”
Iaconetti met her now-husband, Jared Haibon, on “Bachelor in Paradise,” and the two tied the knot in 2019. In the years since, they’ve welcomed two sons and settled into their off-screen — though still massively online — life as a family of four in Rhode Island, Haibon’s home state.
And while her romantic life might finally be stable, Iaconetti finds herself back in the drama among a “Real Housewives of Rhode Island” cast of fiery women who aren’t afraid to raise their voices and point fingers in each other’s faces — and most of whom she’d never met prior to filming (In Episode 1, Iaconetti is introduced to the crew through her friend, Rosie DiMarie, during a beachside picnic).
“I’ve never seen people communicate with each other in the way in which I experienced this summer,” Iaconetti tells Variety. “I couldn’t believe my eyes so many times sitting in these situations, and I can only imagine that I will represent the audience at home watching.”
Below, Variety spoke to Iaconetti about her decision to return to reality TV (as seen on Thursday’s “Real Housewives of Rhode Island” premiere), the differences between the two franchises and her thoughts on “The Bachelorette” and its now-paused Taylor Frankie Paul season.
Before we dive into “Real Housewives,” why did you want to return to reality TV?
I’ve always loved doing it. It’s always been so fun for me. The opportunity to do “The Bachelor” gave me my entire life, my family, my career and I’m just forever grateful for that. I was always open to doing more of it if the opportunity presented itself, and it did. And it’s a whole other world, I’ll tell you that.
So it didn’t take any convincing?
Oh, it did, because this franchise is so much different than “The Bachelor.” It’s a little more mixed into your real life. It’s filmed in your own home, with your family. It gets more incorporated into your life. And so that was something that Jared and I discussed. We went over the decision for over a month, to be honest, because we were in such a happy, great place. And we’re like, “Do we jump into this again?” We know how world rocking it can be, so it took a lot of thought and consideration. I’d rather say “yes” to something and then deal with how long you want to be part of it then say “no” and never experience what could be.
Did being back on camera take any getting used to?
I probably felt more at home than the rest of the cast. It didn’t feel as invasive as I thought it would be. I always had preparation as to when the kids and the family would be on camera, and they weren’t in my house a ton. It was honestly the drama that affected me more. On “The Bachelor,” for the most part, the girls get along pretty well. And here, that is not the case.
Were you a “Housewives” fan before being cast?
Honestly, the most I’ve watched of “Housewives” has been with my mom. She has always loved the OG New York housewives. She watched all their seasons. Hilariously, I don’t watch a ton of reality shows in general. Besides “The Bachelor,” I pretty much would only watch “The Kardashians.” It’s one of those things where if you’re so close to it, you don’t necessarily watch it.
Two episodes in, the women are already not getting along, but you’re not really in the drama mix since you’ve just met them. What was it like coming in and realizing that some of these women have years of history between one another?
Definitely intimidating. I’m definitely an extroverted introvert, and it came out a lot here. I was quite uncomfortable in a lot of these situations. So I just could only sit back and watch it all unfold. I felt like if I were to ever jump into it, it would be honestly inappropriate because these girls didn’t really know me and I didn’t know them.
Had you heard anything about the women before filming began? Was there anything you knew going into it?
To be completely frank, I started [hearing] about the other women once it was solidified that I was part of the cast. So once the cast was in place, and even before that when there were rumblings of who may be cast, my friend group here would tell me, “We see so-and-so at the country club, and this is her reputation.” And like, “Oh, that girl, she knows their family, and she’s like this.” So from my group here I heard a lot of things about these ladies, which is just proof that it is really one degree of separation.
What were your first impressions of the women?
I was scared to meet Jo-Ellen [Tiberi]. I had heard, honestly, the most rumors about Jo-Ellen and her reputation. She’s kind of a gossip queen, and I was worried about meeting her because of that, and then because she and Rosie went into cameras rolling with beef, and obviously I was friends with Rosie. But Jo-Ellen turned out to be quite friendly and far more approachable than I would ever imagined. Alicia [Carmody] had a bigger personality than I imagined her having. Liz [McGraw] was just as intimidating as I thought that she would be, but then I learned after a few hangs that she can be very sweet.
In Episode 2, you and Jo-Ellen get together with your kids, and you really open up about your marriage and motherhood. How much did you want to share about your personal life going into the show?
[Jared and I] don’t really have much to hide. We’re pretty open, and I think that kind of became a weird thing. It kind of becomes a thing where I’m just open about everything that I’d be open about, but I don’t really have any skeletons in the closet. So you guys are acting as if I’m not being open, because I’m not talking about skeletons. But the thing is, you’re not gonna find any in there! The dirtiest stuff about us was how we met, back on the “Bachelor” days. Ever since we haven’t been very dramatic.
We’re in a really stable part of our relationship. But are we always dealing with having two little kids, and does that put a strain on things sometimes? Yes, especially when we were filming. My now 20-month-old was insane the first year of his life, and he really has lightened up in the past two months. But while we were filming, if it seems like motherhood is stressing me out, it’s because I literally had a child that couldn’t go 15 minutes without having a mental breakdown. And now he’s a delight.
What can you tease about the rest of the season?
Some of the girls that you see not getting along initially will end up getting along, and vice versa. They always say that the “Bachelor” season is the most dramatic season ever, and none of those compare to what I lived through over the summer.
Even your “Bachelor in Paradise” seasons?
Like, I’ve never seen people communicate with each other in the way in which I experienced this summer. I couldn’t believe my eyes so many times sitting in these situations and I can only imagine that I will represent the audience at home watching.
Communicate in what ways?
Seeing women scream at each other, point fingers in their faces… I just couldn’t believe the level that some voices can get to in an argument! I don’t know if these arguments are more over the top than your average “Housewives” arguments, but there’s going to be a lot of eye bulging when you watch this. Just like, “Oh my God. I cannot believe she said that.”
Do you think that since people knew you had been on reality TV, they expected you to bring some of that?
I’m so convinced that people are going to be disappointed in me from Bachelor Nation, because I actually did not deliver the drama. I’ve always only been dramatic about love… like, I would only be angry towards a girl if she was coming after my guy. I was like, “I’m sorry, am I so boring?” I’m a witness to all this drama and that, in part, is funny. I’m really stable when I’m married, apparently.
We have to talk about the tears, because they’ve become your signature thing ever since your “Bachelor” days.
I’m not one to raise my voice. My classic drama moment in the Badlands on my two-on-one, I don’t raise my voice. I stay oddly monotone at that moment. And that is what I do here. Like, if somebody is kind of coming at me, I just try to explain myself through tears. There’s a lot of that… And sometimes when I talk about myself, I cry. When I talk about my family or things that are important to me, I just cry. It’ll be interesting to see the way that a Bravo audience takes to me because they’re gonna be like, “Why is this girl who doesn’t get into fights on this show?”
As a big voice in Bachelor Nation, what are your thoughts on Taylor Frankie Paul’s paused “Bachelorette” season?
I recorded an hour-long podcast on this today, and it’s such a nuanced thing. Overall, it’s a good thing that they didn’t go forth with the season. That was a decision that should have been made more carefully earlier on.
We knew very much in detail, based on a lot of the interviews that she’s given, exactly what happened in the video and what led to the arrest. You guys did have her on a TV show for four seasons… It’s an absolutely terrible, terrible video, and the child being there is just awful… She probably should not have been decided to be “The Bachelorette.” That wasn’t an appropriate role for her to fill, and probably was not something that she was mentally, emotionally ready to take on for many reasons — the fact that she was so intertwined with Dakota going into it being one of them. So many things to say.
This interview has been edited and condensed.
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